CONFESSIONS OF A FAT GIRL

Booty Jello

Oh right- like I think a cream is gonna solve my problems...

And like that photo isn't photoshopped anyway? I wish my cellulite looked this pretty...

If it were just that... pattern-happy, I would walk around bottomless just to show off my tush.

Cellulite is U G L Y, last time I looked.

Ads like this piss me off. I wish I had something more substantial and profound to offer you but I've been deprived of Diet Pepsi today and I feel less whole.

Drink Up, Kiddies

So I never drink enough water. A soda and iced tea addict to the core, I would prefer to order either at a restaurant rather than drink the water they put on the table. All day, a bottle of water sits on my desk and I drink a Diet soda instead. No idea why this happens.

Anyway, found this article on the matter- thought I would pass it on. Made me feel recharged...

Health Benefits of Drinking Water, 2/01/2008

by Jen Kersey

We all know that we should be drinking more water.  But why is water so important for our bodies?

First of all we are lovely and very fashionable bags of water walking around!  No joke we are made up of primarily water, around 55-75% at any given time.  In order to keep the cells within our bodies working properly we must keep them hydrated. 

The best source of hydration for these cells is, you guessed it, water! 

Did you know that during normal breathing you "breathe out" two to four cups of water each day? 

You can also sweat out copious amounts of water while walking down to the bus stop, even in cold weather.

Okay, so we know our bodies use a lot of water, but how about some more reasons WHY you should drink water?

Water Eliminates Toxins and Wastes from the Body // Water acts like a shower or a bath for our internal organs.  It cleanses away the dirty by-products that accumulate in our bodies.  By-products are created by the day to day work of our body's cells, through the breakdown of food and drinks that we ingest, and also by the toxins in the environment that we breathe in or absorb through our skin.  Our bodies also "retain fluids."  In order to release these retained fluids (usually due to too much sodium intake) you have to flush them out with MORE water.  *Sounds kind of awkward that the way to get rid of retaining fluids is to drink more water, but it's true!* So drink your water daily to keep your "insides" sparkly clean.

Water Maintains PH-Balance in the Body // What is PH?  PH is the amount of hydrogen particles that make up a sample of liquid.  The more hydrogen per unit of liquid, the more acidic, the less hydrogen the more basic it becomes.  A great example of acidity is flavor of grapefruits versus the flavor of milk.  Citrus fruits contain more acid and have a very sharp flavor.  Milk on the other hand is creamy and contains a softer flavor.  That is the difference between an acid versus a base.

Okay let's continue.  PH has a lot to do in how our bodies function normally.  If the PH is too acidic, it can set your body up for infection and degenerative diseases.  Some micro-organisms flourish in higher PH environments, so by drinking your water you can keep unwanted acids and unwanted germs out of your body.  Being at an acidic PH level can also set your body up for degenerative diseases.  Your cells can actually be damaged the high levels of Hydrogen floating around in your system.  By staying at your ideal PH you can prevent many health disorders.  Water is a natural cure for disease!  Who would have thought that?

Water CAN Make You Glow // By balancing our PH levels and keeping ourselves hydrated, water can restore skin health.  By keeping yourself hydrated and keeping those unwanted toxins from accumulating inside of our bodies, you can keep or improve the look of your skin.  Your skin will be softer, fuller, and more radiant/glowing.
 
Water is THE KEY to LOSING WEIGHT // The secret is out!  Water is the key ingredient in weight loss.  Water can increase your metabolism by 3%.  That may not sound like much, but it actually really is, over time.  If a woman can stay at her desired weight eating approximately 2200 calories a day (moderately active, in their 20s, around 165-220 lbs) and drinks enough water every day, she can burn an additional 24,000 calories per year (almost burning 7 lbs a year alone just by drinking water).

The area in our brains that signifies thirst is also the same place that alerts us when we are hungry.  This area in the brain is called the hypothalamus; it is our body's core regulation center.  Sometimes, slight thirst can be confused by our bodies for hunger.  Hence the snacking mechanisms we have integrated in our systems.  By drinking more water you will snack less!

How Much Water Do I NEED to Drink?

We have all heard the 8 – 8 ounce glasses of water per day (64 oz.) is the key to keeping hydrated.  Well, that is actually a minimum.  You should take your current body weight and divide that by 2.  Then drink in ounces that number of water per day. 

Example:  A Woman that Weights 180 pounds should be drinking 90 ounces of water per day to increase her metabolism and get the health benefits of drinking water.

You need to increase your water intake if you exercise on a daily basis.  On "The Biggest Loser" we were trained that while you are exercising you should drink 1 to 2 'normal' 12-16 ounce bottle of water minimum during 1 hour of exercise.  The warmer the day, the more strenuous activity, we were advised to drink 1 bottle every 15 minutes!  I would suggest for an hour at the gym to brink a 1 liter bottle of water and sip on that throughout the hour.  Make sure you have a cup of water before you head to the gym and re-hydrate afterwards as well.

Just remember next time you're thirsty, grab a bottle of water instead of a bottle of soda!

You are helping yourself in the following ways:

Improving the Quality and Look of Your Skin
Regulating your Appetite and Increasing your Metabolism
Releasing Waste Products and Toxins from Your Body
Decreasing Risks of Cancers, Kidney Stones, High Cholesterol, and High Blood Pressure
Preventing and Reducing Headaches
Decreasing Fluid Retention (Feeling Bloated)
Boosting Your Energy Levels!

CAUTION:  If you have kidney problems, please follow your doctor's recommendation on fluid intake.  There are some medical conditions that require less fluid intake due to an inability to process the fluid through the body's filtration system.  One potential but rare side effect of increased fluid intake is hyponatremia (low electrolytes).  Always remember to seek the advice of a physician before trying any new diet or exercise program!!

Diet Diary

Does anyone keep a journal about their eating and exercise?

I find, for me, it's useless. I'm too busy, have too much on my mind and too much else to do and keep track of to be bothered. Jenny Craig would prefer I wasn't this way but they just havent gotten me to get into the habit yet. After all this time, still hasn't taken.

But I know a lot of people do this and it helps so I am just curious what y'all think about the process.

One reader suggested this website FitDay and they have this software I thought I might try some day when I have 30 bucks to spare. They also have a freebie online journal I could try out. If it's on a computer, it becomes infinitely easier for me to handle for some reason.

Anyway, thoughts, dear readers?

Looks Promising

I got an e-mail about this and I gave it a look. I mean, as far as aesthetics go, it looks clean, user-friendly, sort of quirky and hip... It remains to be seen if it's useful but I certainly love the idea of it.

http://www.diettv.com/

This paragraph is what sold me. It's a sales pitch but that doesn't mean they don't have a good idea:

Let's change the way the world thinks about dieting. We think of a DIET as a fresh start, empowerment, a plan for preventative health care and also peace of mind. We aren't selling any weight loss gimmicks. We're simply applauding your courage and determination to make yourself healthier and happier, one pound at a time.

It Never Rains in Southern California

You know, there is just something about the rain. Mostly, I think it appeals to the romantic in me. I like the pitter-patter of it, the rhythm - it's really almost like music to me. Outside my bedroom window, while I try to sleep, it pitter-pats on the metal overhang making a sort of hollow sound that I've gotten used to and now enjoy. On the road beyond my apartment building, the cars swish by, making a deep splashing sound I like that reminds me the world is buzzing. I take comfort in all of that. I really do like the rain.

The rain also makes me think of cuddling under a blanket or playing with the dog. It makes me think of hot chocolate and cookies or warm soup. Tonight, it made me think of the french onion soup on the menu but I had the salad instead. An excellent, delicious salad in fact, but I still think of the soup with its melted cheese on top. I also thought of the potato and onion tart but had the grilled shrimp instead. Still ate the side of rice, by the way.

Came home, watched a good show on PBS and enjoyed... a doughnut. Oh, I don't even like doughnuts but there it was, glistening and somehow saying "it's raining! Have a treat!"

I shake my fist at you, infuritating doughnut!

BBW

“Feeling fat is worse than being fat!”

-Geneen Roth

Thank you to “K8-EEE” for that marvelous quote. I really like that.

What makes YOU feel fat? How often do you say to yourself or out loud, “Shit, I feel sooooo fat.” How often do you hear someone else say that? How often is that person skinny?

Just some food for thought. Pun intended.

I learned a new internet acronym this month. “BBW.” Have you heard this? I guess it’s for “Big Beautiful Woman.” I saw it on a dating website as in “no BBW’s please” and then again as “BBW’s welcome. Size not important.” I pretty much figured out what it meant on my own but had a friend explain it to me anyway.

I don’t know if I am a BBW. It’s not clearly defined. It’s not a “real” word, after all. I mean, there’s a page for it on Wikipedia and as much as I love me the Wikipedia, even they can’t help. Although they do mention “SSBBW,” the “super sized” version, which is over a size 26. “According to who?” I wonder.

So is BBW someone who shops in a plus size department? I guess that would make sense to me. But what is plus sized? Plus sized models are usually sizes 10 or 12. But plus sized clothes usually begin at 14W or 16W – and I happen to think they shouldn’t start til size 18, by the way.

And for the record, I’ve come to realize that BBW is really just a euphemism for “fat.” I mean, isn’t it? A more P.C. way to say overweight, right? Like “curvy” or “voluptuous.” These are the words girls on match.com and Craigslist use to make it clear they are not skinny without being forced to admit they are overweight.

Like it’s something to be ashamed of.

Look, we all have our problems. I am ashamed of the fact that I have struggled to quit smoking and have hid that from various friends. I am ashamed of the fact that when I was at my senior prom, I made out with my friend’s date (story for another time). But I am not ashamed of my size. I am frustrated with it, I am working on it and I am progressing. But shame is such a depressing, morbid, horrible emotion that makes me feel embarrassed and disgusted, even repulsed. And I don’t think anyone with a problem that they often cannot control should feel ashamed. Especially when said person is trying to rise above it.

Really, I am just rambling here. But I hope I made some sense along the way.

An Oldie but Goodie

Might be an interesting read for some. Thanks to Melissa for the link.

NEW YORK TIMES

November 24, 1998

Courting Women Big and Small

By ANNE-MARIE SCHIRO

The name Max Mara doesn't resonate with American women the way Giorgio Armani's does, but the Max Mara company outsells Armani around the world. At last count, it was $906 million to $846 million annually. Why? Because the clothes offer timely fashion in luxury fabrics at less than astronomical prices.

Still less known is Marina Rinaldi, Max Mara's plus-size division, but by bringing youthful styling to a category that was once dowdy and matronly, it has gone far to change the way women who wear large sizes dress.

Max Mara offers Italian-made clothing in silk, cashmere, alpaca, leather and other fine fabrics, the same caliber of materials found in designer clothing but at lower prices. If a woman wants a cashmere blazer, say, she can find one with a Max Mara label for less than $1,000, as opposed to at least $2,000 for one with a designer name attached to it. While the company is known for its classics, it also hops on trends like the leather skirts and jackets and the mirror appliques in its spring 1999 collection.

Marina Rinaldi also uses cashmere, silk and leather, generally in sophisticated colors like gray, camel and black, in clothes with simple slenderizing lines. Some of its new customers remember when large-size clothing meant pastel polyester pants suits and tentlike dresses with flounces. Marina Rinaldi was in the vanguard of companies that brought fashion to the category.

''Max Mara is not cutting edge, but classic fashionable clothing in beautiful fabrics,'' said Lynne Ronan, a senior vice president and general merchandise manager of Saks Fifth Avenue, which has an in-store Max Mara boutique and sells the Marina Rinaldi collection in its plus-size department, Salon Z. Marina Rinaldi's prices range from $250 for a skirt to $5,000 for a mink-trimmed coat. Sizes are 10 to 22.

''The plus-size customer wants to look exactly like everybody else,'' Ms. Ronan said. ''We work with a lot of manufacturers to put more fashion into the clothes. Marina Rinaldi is an important resource for us. It's a high-quality product, beautifully made, and it has the right fit.''

For many years, fit was a prime concern in the plus-size category, one that the Max Mara company recognized early on. ''We started making large sizes in 1979,'' Luigi Maramotti, the co-managing director of Max Mara, said on a recent trip to New York. ''What we did was what everybody else was doing: stretch from regular sizes. But that is totally wrong.''

Sizing patterns upward in the usual way results in overly broad shoulders and long sleeves, low waistlines and baggy crotches in pants. But women who wear size 16 or 18 aren't necessarily taller than a size 8. Mode, the magazine for plus-size women, estimates that 62 percent of American women wear size 12 or larger. (Not all those women can afford Marina Rinaldi or comparable prices and still have a hard time finding fashionable clothes.)

So Max Mara set up an independent company devoted to perfecting pattern-making and called it Marina Rinaldi, after Mr. Maramotti's great-great-grandmother, who owned a dress shop. There are now 170 Marina Rinaldi company-owned boutiques in Europe, Asia and the Middle East, as well as in-store boutiques in Bloomingdale's, Saks and Bergdorf Goodman. The label represents about 20 percent of Max Mara's business.

Max Mara has ambitious plans to make both the Max Mara and Marina Rinaldi lines important players in the United States, as they already are in many countries around the world with 700 company-owned stores.

The big push started in 1994, with the opening of a Max Mara boutique on 68th Street and Madison Avenue. That was followed by 14 more stores around the country, by the doubling in size this fall of the Manhattan store, the opening of a Marina Rinaldi store on Madison Avenue last month and the arrival this month of Max Mara and Marina Rinaldi boutiques on Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills. A party in Los Angeles on Dec. 3 will celebrate the opening of the two boutiques. A dinner will follow a private screening of a restored version of the 1948 film ''Joan of Arc'' starring Ingrid Bergman. The co-chairwomen of the event are Jodie Foster, Isabella Rossellini and Winona Ryder.

Richard Avedon photographed the current Max Mara advertising campaign, which features the model Maggie Rizer with a Joan of Arc hairdo. Marina Rinaldi's ads, with the slogan ''Style is not a size . . . it's an attitude,'' has a whimsical quality, with a healthy-looking model making gravity-defying leaps. The ads run in fashion magazines and on billboards and bus shelters.

All this is in aid of a company that has never set the fashion world on fire yet managed to attract customers like Ms. Rossellini, Minnie Driver and C. Z. Guest.

Marina Rinaldi is the first plus-size line to be carried by Bergdorf's, said Joseph Boitano, the store's executive vice president and general merchandise manager.

''We'd always done some large sizes, but mostly on a special-order basis,'' he said. ''We knew we had a customer who wore large sizes and could buy other things here, but not ready-to-wear. So we went into the market knowing that anything we bought had to be on a par with the quality of the rest of the store. Marina Rinaldi is at that level.''

For spring, Bergdorf's will add the new Rebecca Moses large-size line as a complement to Marina Rinaldi, he said.

The Marina Rinaldi stores at 800 Madison Avenue (between 67th and 68th Streets) and at 319 Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills are the first in this country, and will be watched closely by the parent company, Mr. Maramotti said, to determine whether more will follow. The line has already found fans in Rosie O'Donnell, Roseanne Barr (who dropped $10,000 in one visit to Madison Avenue), Star Jones and Camryn Manheim.

Max Mara, which started in Italy in 1951 as one of the first fashion houses to offer ready-made clothes to Italian women, was founded by Mr. Maramotti's father, Achille. It is still family-owned, with Luigi's brother, Ignazio, sharing the title of managing director and their sister, Ludovica, chairwoman of one of the family's six manufacturing firms.

All the clothing is made in company-owned factories, three of which are in Reggio Emilia, where the company is based. Max Mara is now the largest ready-to-wear company in Italy, producing 20 collections. Among them are Sportmax, younger and more fashion-forward than Max Mara; Weekend, which is casual, and Pianoforte, the evening-wear division. Prices range from $450 to $650 for jackets, $800 to $2,000 for coats.

Unlike other old-line houses looking to glamorize their images and increase sales by hiring high-profile designers, Max Mara depends on an anonymous design team headed by Laura Lusuardi. Mr. Maramotti says his company is more interested in quality than fashion, yet Max Mara regularly presents its namesake collection and Sportmax on the runways in Milan during the semiannual show seasons. The lines are reviewed as seriously as those of Armani, Versace and Gucci, though not with the same superlatives.

Yet the company's sales in this country have increased 500 percent since 1994, and with more boutiques set to open, the Maramottis' hopes are high that the company's profile will also keep growing.

A Little Guilt Free Deliciousness

Ok, I really love Banana bread so I am totally gonna have to try this. And I am always happy to see walnuts excluded as I am allergic to them-- so there.

Anyone ever made the "low fat" banana bread from Trader Joes? I picked up a box or the mix and am also planning to stir that up. I wonder if that's gonna be any good...

All this talk about Banana Bread and now I am really pissed I don't have a slice here.

FROM "HUNGRY GIRL"

Go Bananas!
Banana bread typically has pretty horrific nutritionals, so we set out to create a guilt-free version. And (tada!) here it is.

Ingredients:
1 1/4 cups whole-wheat flour
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
3/4 cup Splenda No Calorie Sweetener (granulated)
1 1/2 cups mashed ripe bananas (about 3 bananas)
1/2 cup fat-free egg substitute (like Egg Beaters)
1/2 cup no-sugar-added applesauce
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. salt
Optional Toppings: no-calorie spray butter, Cool Whip Free

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. In a large bowl, combine both types of flour, Splenda, baking powder, salt, and cinnamon (in other words, all dry ing redients). In a separate bowl, mix together the mashed bananas, egg substitute, applesauce, and vanilla extract (all the wet ingredients). Add this mixture to the bowl with the dry ingredients, and stir until just blended. Spoon batter into a large loaf pan (about 9" X 5") sprayed with nonstick spray. Bake for about 50 minutes, or until a knife inserted in the middle comes out clean. Allow to cool slightly, and then cut into 8 slices. If you like, spritz with some spray butter or spread on some Cool Whip Free. MAKES 8 SERVINGS

Serving Size: 1 (thick!) slice
Calories: 140
Fat: 0.5g
Sodium: 267mg
Carbs: 31g
Fiber: 3.75g
Sugars: 7g
Protein: 5g 

BOOBIES!

A personal referral from my friend Alycia, whom I've known for years -- she swear by this sports bra. As a chesty gal, I can certainly appreciate that!

Click here to check it out...

It's such a bitch for me, because heavy or not, I am still large-chested. At my "skinniest" (which was like a size 12 or 14), I was still a DDD and now, at my current weigh, I'm dealing with something like a G cup. Can you imagine? God, I get the funniest looks in department stores.

I guess I wear it well though, cause when I go into Victoria's Secret, they always offer to help me find my size and I say "oh, you don't make my size." Without fail, some sales girl will say "sure we do! What size are you?" When I tell her, she just has to concede defeat and walk away. It's just something I am used to now and find amusing. I've had some luck at Nordstrom with bras but usually I end up having to buy online.

Alycia, by the way (and I hope she doesn't mind my saying this) was a bigger girl in the days I knew her well (high school) and always battled with her weight. I remember we would compare notes on how our mothers would nag us about our size. Well, I don't have a photo of how she looked then but I have got to show you how completely gorgeous she is now... She's on the right here:

I'm gushing a bit but I'm so proud of her.

But anyway, I digress -- this was meant to be all about my boobs. A topic I am so sure you are dying to know about.

A particular favorite? When guys ask me what size I am. "Fuck you, that's what size I am," I say, borrowing a page from Dennis Leary's repetoire.

My dream is to get the weight off, get the boobs down, and pick up jogging as a hobby. I have a bad ankle but dammit, I feel like I would enjoy the freedom and spirit of it. A lot of my friends have been doing it and I envy them this activity. One of my friends has to wear two sports bras for the right kind of support - do a lot of girls do this? Just wondering. Seems like a good idea. Nothing worse than that bounce.

By the way- I HATE speed bumps. LOATHE them. 

The back problems are an annoyance. My back hurts a lot, a lot of the time and when I sleep, if I want to turn or shift, most of the time, I sort of have to double-shift and bring the boobs with me, making sure they're not being smooshed or squeezed so I am uncomfortable. This is harder than it sounds.

You understand now why I don't appreciate empire waists or certain necklines that are unrealistic. Who is designing this shit? Morons, I think. Morons or flate-chested nimrods.

And as for plastic surgery- I've considered it and boy do I want it. But no one would do it while I am this overweight. My boobs won't shrink too much from weightloss at this point but they will shrink a little. And, of course, there is the matter of paying for the surgery - whatever my crap insurance won't cover.

Total non-sequitr-- SO glad to have tomorrow off. I hope everyone is enjoying a nice, long weekend.

Just a Little FYI

I figured... Why not?

Lands' End Official Site
www.LandsEnd.com