Every morning, I listen to KROQ. In Los Angeles, that's 106.7 FM.
In fact, when I got my new job this past April, I was sort of excited it involved a longer commute than my previous position. Previously, I was in the car at most for 15 minutes. Now, I get nearly an hour. That's how much I love Kevin and Bean in the mornings.
And Kevin and Bean have a cast of characters. Their most frequent, nearly-permanent co-host is Ralph, my future husband (apologies to his wife - she seems nice but I'm on a mission); and there's Lisa May, the woman in the room. I guess she's like Howard Stern's Robin Quivers? She reports on the traffic and otherwise just participates in the conversation all morning.
Just giving you a little background -- in case you're not from L.A.
Well, there's been a little buzz lately. A few clever Marines were savvy enough to get themselves up on YouTube, asking celebs to the Marine Corp Ball. Pretty brilliant if you ask me. As such, Corporal Kelsey De Santis will be attending with Justin Timberlake and Sgt. Scott Moore is going with Mila Kunis on his arm.
As public figures, could they REALLY say no to these proposals? Well, Betty White did but I guess you can't hate Betty White, like EVER. And in a brilliant stunt, of all people, Linda Hamilton tuned into it and asked Betty's rejected Marine to go with HER.
I guess we could very well end up with all kinds of proposals from her. Who's turn down a Marine? That would make you a pretty big asshole... I guess you'd just have to be as beloved as Betty White to turn down that request.
Well, Lisa May of KROQ, you are NO Betty White.
Honey, you're not even THAT famous in LA and I doubt many outside our fair city knows who you are. And you were HONORED with a request to join a Marine to the annual ball. In San Diego. That's about 120 miles away. And you know KROQ would get you a car and give you all the press in their corporate-controlled nazi-budget would allow. And you would be the friggin' superstar of that ball. Nevermind how much it would mean to the Marine who asked...
And you said NO?!
Lisa May, why do you hate America? (Kevin and Bean are now teasing her she is part of the Taliban.) ARE YOU MAD?! You're gonna find him a "better" date... He asked YOU, you thankless twit. Your boyfriend isn't gonna mind. I promise.
And lest any amount of retweets and blog like this one change your mind: DON'T LET THEM. Don't go, Lisa May. As of now, you no longer deserve the proposition.
I'm not a Marine and I am insulted, Lisa May.
P.S. (Hey Ralph, I'm totally not a Marine but I'll find a ball to go to if you'll take me to it...)
