CONFESSIONS OF A FAT GIRL

Holy Crap, We Have a Winner

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There is so much to say about this but frankly, I think the video really speaks for itself.

Although, I will say, it brings a whole new meaning to the term "funbags." Also, "dirty pillows."

Art to Love

So I discovered via a friend of mine this website: http://www.curiousartist.com/

It's a showcase for up and comer artists and designers, etc.

Anyway, one painting in particular by Richard Wilkinson touched me and I think you'll agree it speaks to all of us.

It's called "Learn to Love Fat." Good for him, I say.

Are curvier women smarter?

This is just brilliant. Thank you, Casey, for the link.

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/health/2008/01/04/fortin.hfh.curvy.women.cnn

530 POUNDS!!!

Tomorrow on Oprah, they are telling incredible weightloss stories, featuring a woman who lost FIVE HUNDRED AND THIRTY pounds. Can you imagine? I mean, what would you have to start at to lose 530 pounds and still be a human being afterwards? That's pretty amazing, kids. I don't know if anyone is an Oprah fan (but come on, how could you NOT be?) but you should check this out.

In my constant quest for inspiration, I will be glued to the TV to see it.

How did everyone fare over the holiday weekend? I was doing quite well at my mom and dad's house. I sort of lucked out since my mom made sure there was a big salad on the table and for desert, my Aunt brought a "sugar free and fat free yogurt pie" from Bigg Chill. It wasn't exactly riddled with flavor but I didn't feel left out while everyone else ate whatever they wanted.

Of course, it all went to hell at my friend's house, where I went afterward. She's the most incredible cook and she makes everything from scratch and I knew from years past, there would be no way for me to fight off the ricotta quiche. It's amazing. For 364 days, I await its precious entry into my tummy. Mmmm.... So there was that and there were homeade biscuits. Not a total disaster but not really the smashing success I'd been aiming for.

As I skipped Jenny Craig last week, my conscience will undoubtedly force my lazy tush over there tomorrow so we'll see just how much of a mess I made.

And on a side note, FYI, you'll notice some new widgets and things along the sides of my page. Ever the technology junkie, I love to try out new gizmos and programming codes so bare with me. Of course, feel free to use them. Also feel free to make suggestions.

Snack time. I'm jubilant.

I'm on the Wrong Diet

Ok, seriously, what am I doing on Jenny Craig?

From the book description: "For the millions of women unable to reach orgasm, or for those who want to improve their sex lives, here is an easy-to-follow diet and exercise plan to bring women to orgasm for the first time … and every time they have sex."

Well, shit. Sign me up, home-cookin'.

I'm watching a CBS show on Tivo and every commercial break, there's my local anchor. "Foods that can give you an orgasm. The ORGASM DIET. Tonight at 11." Well, I went to the website but no sign of the story and it's after 11 so I've missed my window. Oh sure, the commercial gave me the heebie jeebies - it would give you them too if you heard your local anchor saying "orgasm" 5 times in 30 seconds... anyway, you know you'd wanna know all about it.

Shit, I'm tempted to buy the book!

Ok, here's an effed up commercial: http://www.cbs2.com/video/?id=52795@kcbs.dayport.com

Yeah, tell me that doesn't leave you half curious and half creeped the hell out, right?

But yeah, if there's a DIET out there that'll satisfy me and SATISFY me, I'm jumping on the bandwagon. And then I'm buying the rights, setting up shop, and franchising it out. I will be a millionaire. I'll be the orgasm queen.

And really, between the 115 of us? In my life, I have never been the orgasm Queen, unfortunately.

I will be YouTubing this nonsense if anyone needs me.

Fatties on the News

Whenever they do one of these segments on overweight issues on the news, they cut to video of "fat" people walking in the city. They never show their faces but I live in fear that one day I'll be watching one of these segments and recognize MYSELF on the TV. That's all I need.

Of course, they are saying people who were promised $35 lost more weight than those who were promised a reward of $7.

Where's MY cash, ABC 7 News? Pay up!

Infuriating

So of course I know better than to let something horrible and smutty like The Enquirer get to me but this just really ticks me off:

When is it going to end? Did you know a "plus size" model is a size 12? God, I would kill to be a size 12 when I woke up tomorrow morning.

I think Kelly Clarkson is fabulous, curves, "fatness," n' all.

Kirstie Alley never looked better. Fuck you, National Enquirer.